A Debt Paid

In Jerry Bridges' book The Gospel for Real Life it states the following:

“The purpose of this book is to explore those unsearchable riches. To appreciate them, however, we need to look briefly at our sinful condition. Though we live in a time when people don’t like to talk about sin, only those who understand to some degree the enormity of their spiritual debt can begin to appreciate what Christ did for them at the cross. Without some heartfelt conviction of our sin, we can have no serious feeling of personal interest in the gospel. What’s more, this conviction should actually grow throughout our Christian lives. In fact, one sign of spiritual growth is an increased awareness of our sinfulness.”

I recently met an elderly man who would cry whenever he would hear the name of Jesus. I have been thinking about that a lot lately; mainly because I am not there, not even close. It strikes me that perhaps one of the reasons he would cry upon hearing our Lords name is that he had a great understanding of his own sinfulness and therefore a greater appreciation for what Jesus did for him. As I was reflecting upon that this morning God brought to my mind the story found in Luke 7:36-49. I encourage you to read the entire story and associated parable but it is summarized by Jesus in 44-47:

Luke 7:44 And he turned to the woman, and said unto Simon, Seest thou this woman? I entered into thine house, thou gavest me no water for my feet: but she hath washed my feet with tears, and wiped them with the hairs of her head.
7:45 Thou gavest me no kiss: but this woman since the time I came in hath not ceased to kiss my feet.
7:46 My head with oil thou didst not anoint: but this woman hath anointed my feet with ointment.
7:47 Wherefore I say unto thee, Her sins, which are many, are forgiven; for she loved much: but to whom little is forgiven, the same loveth little.

The fact is that I not been “forgiven little” I have been forgiven much – all of us have! Unlike this woman I do not yet comprehend the enormity of my spiritual debt that Jesus paid for me.

John Piper states that we will never fully comprehend the depth of our sinfulness but as we grow spiritually we can gain a greater understanding of it. By God’s grace may he reveal to us more and more how great a debt He paid for us and thereby causing us to truly treasure Jesus above all things!

The gospel tells us that Jesus Christ paid our debt, but it also tells us far more. It tells us that we are not enemies or objects of His wrath. We are His sons and daughters, heirs with Jesus Christ of all His unsearchable riches. This is the good news of the gospel. This is why the women in the story wept and the elderly man cried. We need to remember this every day.

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A few weeks ago we got an email from someone we do not know but her words touched our hearts and we feel compelled to share.

We will call her E, we consider her a new friend and she has a dear and sweet spirit. I feel as though I have known her for a long time, her words and the spirit in which they were delivered feel so familiar.

She read our blog and said "Sometimes you don’t realize how far you have come until someone points out that progress, or perhaps you see that progress in another." To know that someone reads this blog makes me smile. To know that this blog touches some one's heart makes me cry and increases my faith that we are indeed on the correct path. I find great peace in the fact that there are others who fins our story to be similar to their own, who struggle our struggles and tread our same path.

I wrote back to E something along these lines: It has been a long hard road and we are still traveling; but each day, week, month and year we grow a bit more, learn a bit more and find our way down the path just a bit more. We get so caught up in how far we have to go that we don’t take the time to look back to see how far we have come. On our blog at one point earlier this year, (February maybe) I remember talking about the road and two different feelings; having come so far on a quiet road vs. not being able to see the path through the mist.

I often forget how far we have come and yet at times it seems like we are back at the beginning again. *like a yo-yo* I believe this all part of the plan to keep us moving forward, if you think you are getting close to being done, you must be reminded of how long eternity is and how the road can change! And that is how we receive the blessing of new challenges! *The blessing of new challenges; 2 years ago those words would not ever be used in the same sentence. I truly believe that by trials and endurance, we grow and gain faith. It is through that new faith that we are blessed. *

Anyhow, it was nice to know someone reads our blog! E, thank you for your kind words!

The Refiner of Silver

This journey of grief and healing is a private journey; a mountain that I must climb to find true healing and acceptance. Strange as it may sound, I find comfort in knowing that the hill is mine, and only mine to climb. I get to do it at my pace, however I see fit.

Some days I walk through a sunlit forest path. The walking is easy and my burden is light. I know I have traveled far but I am not weary from the journey. The sun warms my skin and the shade cools my brow. I am comforted in knowing that we will see our dear babies again someday; I find sweet joy in the confidence that somewhere out there, our next baby awaits his or her turn to come into our arms, that his or her mother is making choices that will allow that to happen.


On other days I stand surrounded by the mists of despair and look up to the top of the mountain; the things I have yet to feel and overcome; the path that must be followed to be able to embrace our awaiting child with open arms and hearts, and the path seems too much to bear. I feel unworthy and unable to continue. It is these times that I try to remember a few things.



1. The Spirit has guided us to this path toward adoption. We feel the Spirit prompting us each step of the way.

2. He holds us in the palm of his hand, we are not forgotten. He is aware of each thought, each hope and each second of despair. He knows me perfectly and He loves me perfectly. I feel His concern and awareness of me on such an intimate level.

3. Elder Maxwell said it best: "To go to the very edge is possible, of course, only when we believe in an omniscient and omnipotent God. When we understand that all things are present before His eyes and that He knows all things past, present, and future, then we can trust ourselves to Him as we clearly could not to a less than omniscient god who is off somewhere in the firmament doing further research."


Our Missionaries came for dinner last week and Elder Horner shared the following story.
The Refiner of Silver

Malachi 3:3 says: "He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver."

This verse puzzled some women in a Bible study and they wondered what this statement meant about the character and nature of God.

One of the women offered to find out the process of refining silver and get back to the group at their next Bible Study.

That week, the woman called a silversmith and made an appointment to watch him at work. She didn't mention anything about the reason for her interest beyond her curiosity about the process of refining silver.

As she watched the silversmith, he held a piece of silver over the fire and let it heat up. He explained that in refining silver, one needed to hold the silver in the middle of the fire where the flames were hottest as to burn away all the impurities.

The woman thought about God holding us in such a hot spot then she thought again about the verse that says: "He sits as a refiner and purifier of silver."

She asked the silversmith if it was true that he had to sit there in front of the fire the whole time the silver was being refined. The man answered that yes, he not only had to sit there holding the silver, but he had to keep his eyes on the silver the entire time it was in the fire.

If the silver was left a moment too long in the flames, it would be destroyed.

The woman was silent for a moment. Then she asked the silversmith, "How do you know when the silver is fully refined?"

He smiled at her and answered, "Oh, that's easy - when I see my reflection in it."

If today you are feeling the heat of the fire, remember that God has His eye on you and will keep watching you until He sees His reflection in you.